Sunday, June 11, 2006

Adventures in Job Hunting

As of late, I’ve managed to snag some job interviews up here in the great white north. I’ve applied for positions with titles such as Technical Writer, Proposal Specialist and other generally uptight-sounding monikers. Each time I tell these human resources people that I applied for a particular job because I love to write, they hastily inform me: “But you understand this is business writing, not fiction.”

Really? No way! If you briefly read my resume, you’ll learn that I studied business writing in college, and therefore understand the style of writing for which you are willing to pay someone money to produce. Why do people assume that business writing is such a boring job? I don’t care what I’m writing, I love to write. I know a lot of writers won’t agree with me. I thought technical writing would be boring when I began to study it, but I found that I enjoy doing it almost as much as I enjoy making shit up (a.k.a. writing fiction).

To me, the joy is in the process, whether or not the subject matter personally interests me is negligible. I love communicating effectively; it makes me feel like a badass. Ok, well, not literally a badass, I mean, it’s not like I’m shoplifting or boosting a car. Not that I would know what either of those activities really feel like. Obviously, a poor comparison. Anyway, most people don’t know how to properly construct a sentence. I know how to write directions so that a sixth grader can figure out how to use a software suite. Yes, I am aware of what an enormous geek I am. Over the years, I have learned to embrace it.

I say, down with human resources! Just because you don’t like your job, doesn’t mean I won’t like mine! If I can actually find one, that is. I must learn to defeat these demons that guard the gates to employment. Why do they ask such inane questions? There must be a right answer to “What do you see yourself doing in 10 years?” that will get me a second interview. Otherwise, I see myself vacuuming the living room, baking pies, and issuing time-outs.

7 comments:

mad said...

To me, that question "Where do you see yourself..." is kind of a trick question because there is no real good answer, only a bunch of bad ones. After a bunch of trial and error, emphasis on error, I finally just say, I dunno, I can't see that far in the future. I only know that whatever it is I'm doing I'll be the very best at it.

P.S. I'm glad you're back!

cadiz12 said...

when you figure out the answer to that, please let us know. b/c i'm pretty sure more than one person has written me off b/c i didnt' know what i wanted to be doing 10 years from then.

Dad said...

Somewhere in the not-too-distant past, someone at a school of management got together with someone at a school of psychology and the two of them decided to create the ideal interview technique for finding out whether an applicant will make a "good" employee.

The two things that have become the watchword of HR people are 1)Ask open-ended questions and 2) find out what ambitions the applicants have.

Thus was born the "Where do you see yourself in 10 years?" question. It has the obvious appeal of being both open-ended and focusing on ambitions. It is taught in every management seminar, web-site and self-help magazine in the country. It is the HR capitulation to psycho-babble.

Does that make it sound any more intelligent?

girlspit said...

Not really. But, as a side note, do you know EVERYTHING? No wonder you kick my ass at Trivial Pursuit.

Joe Powell said...

pssst ....
don't tell him I said this, but yeah he thinks knows ... heh heh ...

and whenever some HR person asks me that question, i usually say, "After ten years here, I should at least have your job. Or own the company." And smile big.

Wait. I'm unemployed too. Forget everything I said.

Gloria Glo said...

You *are* back officially! You were missed! Sorry it took me so long to get back here!

DogMan said...

The name still cracks me up. Glad to see you still blogging, love it! I've been on a mental vacation for a year or so, but I'm back.